Bogotá?

I'm still waiting to go! Still have some administrative things to take care of: getting documents apostilled etc so hopefully by the end of the month I'll be there. I'm taking a short breather from the pen pics while I think about my next subjects.

We're off to the swimming pool today. I'm going to see if I can teach my hydrophobic wife to have confidence in the water. We're going with the kids because once again they are not at school. I have to say that the social services are a lot more relaxed here than in England. They didn't go to school all last week nor on Monday this week. The youngest, Juan Felipe didn't go to school at all during the last school year. I think back to the trouble I had because I took my kids on holiday for a week in June a couple of years ago and the difference is striking!

Well, it's nearly the weekend so I'll catch up on the season here and bring a little scoop of life in the Colombian League (sponsored by Postobón which is the biggest Colombian soft-drinks company). Our team is Juniors from Barranquilla, the nearest league team to Valledupar. One oddity is that the Colombians cheer every goal in a match, even goals scored against them! What the f*@k??!!??

Off to the pool it is then, chaaaaaaaaooooooooo

Comments

I have mentioned previously that I never get any comments left to my posts so I wonder if it is worth continuing. So, I thought to myself, what could I do to encourage a comment or two? How about some pen pics? Let's see.

First up Leon Johnson

The self-proclaimed "Wolverine" of the Wycombe Wanderers squad. He's been unlucky to suffer a few injuries but manages to recover in good time to return to the squad. What I'd like to know is this: if he is the "Wolverine" then why did he star alongside John Travolta in "Get Shorty" instead of taking a role in one of the "X-Men" films? It is also no secret that he is taking a Business course so gets away early every Wednesday to attend so will we soon be treated to the image of a suit wearing Johnno behind his desk in some fancy office?

Next up: Matt Bloomfield

Matt "I never get tired of running" Bloomfield. Read it in the match reports about the energy in the midfield for Wycombe this season. Alright he shares the job with Monty (Coming soon to a blog near you) but his energy has been a feature of Wycombe sides for almost seven years. Also, in common with Johnno, he is no stranger to the big screen. I'll be checking out three of these films this week on tv here. It's a bit of a "Blooms" season on the film channels.

As Jason Bourne

At the End of Season Awards

Bogotá to Valledupar (a little late in the day but here it is)

I booked my flight to Valledupar in the airport at Bogotá, so much cheaper than booking in the UK. Trouble was that it would not leave until lunchtime the next day so I had sixteen hours to kill in the airport. There are no baggage lockers so I had to sit with my bags and I wasn't going to risk my bags being pilfered while I slept so it meant another night without sleep.

Pizza and a glass of Águila en aeropuerto El Dorado

First things first I decided to eat, so off to the pizza parlour for me. I called Cecy to let her know what was going on but had hardly any life left in the battery. She was trying to give me the address for her sister so I could stay there for the night but I couldn't understand her very well over the phone. In the middle of trying to explain to her that it would be better to text me the address, while she was insisting that it was quicker over the phone the battery died. At least I still had my pizza and a beer. What I didn't have was a charger for my phone or at least no charger that I could use with the sockets in the airport. For the rest of the night I spent a lot of time wandering up and down with my bags to stay awake interspersed with the odd cup of coffee in Juan Valdez. It seemed to take forever for the sun to rise but I loved the symbolism. This was the dawn of a new life for me. How would it go? I knew the concerns of all my family and friends and of course I felt them as well but I believed in Cecy, I believed in us. For me this was an adventure well worth taking. There is always risk in life but this was one I felt was worth it. True! I was leaving everything behind, everything I had ever worked for. I was leaving my sons, my friends and an excellent job. I was going to miss the banter. But this was better than a lottery ticket, the prize was much greater and the chance of winning was incredibly good. I was returning to my fiancée and I had already tasted life with her. Oh yeah! This was worth any risk.

Progress the next morning. I managed to buy a Sony Ericsson charger so I had the phone back to life before boarding the plane to Valledupar. The luggage that had been left in Venezuela would be in Valledupar to greet me (so I was told). The sun rose about five o'clock so I had what seemed like an eternal wait to fly the last leg of my journey but eventually the plane was ready and we were off to Valledupar, if a little late. At last I had the solice of an English style beer before boarding in a bar called BBC (which they claim to be their trademark), the Bogotá Beer Company.
We landed in Valledupar about an hour late. While waiting to collect my bags I was scanning for Cecy in the arrivals lounge........and then there she was. Cecy and the kids there to greet me, to welcome me home. The colombian flags were out when we arrived home so it felt like a real occasion. Here I was, home. Time to start preparing for the wedding!

What Juan Felipe likes

Perhaps I should say what he's good at. He has an encyclopaedic knowledge of dinosaurs so he really enjoyed the day that the dinosaurs came to town. They had a display in the shopping centre, la zona comercial Guatapurí.

Mi familia Colombiana

Mis amores aquí, mi esposa maravillosa y los niños.

Tania Vanesa, mi reina Cecy y Juan Felipe

Everything is great!

What a storm we had yesterday! We went to the library with the kids to help Vanesa with her homework.......in human biology; immunology and locomotion. Errrrrrrrrrrm, what!? Didn't I study that for twenty years up to university level? We left the library soon after I started answering all of the questions as soon as they asked them. What were they thinking? Would we have gone to the library to check out questions on cars if I was a mechanic? There are times when females completely mystify me. Having said that it was great to get out of the house together. An extra added bonus was that after weeks of hot weather which Cecy finds intolerable, especially strong sunshine, it was cold (in relative terms). You didn't need to be Mark White (the chef at WWFC training ground) to see that a storm was coming. The sky was black and the palms were blowing all over the place. It was a really refreshing day.

Con mi diosa, qué linda

We got home just in time though because taxis don't operate when it's raining. Yes, that's right. You can only call a taxi when the weather is fine because the roads flood when it rains! Anyway, shortly after getting home the heavens opened, with a vengeance. The storm was directly overhead, how the hell did it get past the mountains? We are surrounded on all sides. There were a few screams as the bolts of lightning cracked down into the barrio but the girls were able to comfort me ;-D In fact I was watching a DVD by myself in the bedroom when I got the call to action. The rain had flooded the backyard and was nor running into the house. Action time! Shirt off I ran into the patio to check out the drain. It was blocked. OK, I was gonna have to reach in to see what the blockage was, hoping that it wasn't a snake. Good news? Yeah, it was a flip-flop! So a little drama for a change, actually a welcome relief.

Another bonus for the day was the chance to snap a couple more pictures. It's really difficult to get a picture of the wife these days as she's always critical of her photos. Another aspect of females I can't comprehend. When I spend all day every day telling how beautiful she is to me, why does she always think she looks ugly in her photos? Judge for yourself but I won't change my opinion.

Cecy and Juan Felipe

We all went to the Zona Comerciál Guatapurí a couple of days ago, the main shopping centre. It was just to get out of the house for a change once again, ice-creams for the kids (and they do have some great flavours here) and for me?.....What else but a cup of coffee in Juan Valdéz! Cecy fancied some grapes so we went to Carrefour but couldn't find any! What?!?!?! As it happens there were grapes but they were the wrong type. I can't tell you the names of all the fruits in the store, I'm still trying to get used to them myself although there is once that's seems to have been named after that song on Sesame Street...it's a Guanabaná.

 It killed me to see all the Xmas stuff in the store. I don't think I'll be able to start working until just after Xmas so I know it's going to be guilt central for me, not to mention that it is Cecy's birthday in January. Way to make a good first impression eh? Bollocks up Xmas and her first birthday together. Man! Am I going to have some making up to do once I start working.

Around the barrio

I took a few pics yesterday just to illustrate a little of our vecindad.

This is my seat in front of the house on the terrace. Hold old am I rocking away here? You just have to understand that the pace of life here is different, it's not very often that you will be told, "Apúrate!" or "hurry up" but you will often hear, "Tranquilo" or "Fresco" or "Cálmate". Obviously, all telling you to chill. It is also not unusually to get the hi-fi out front, next to the seat, to enter the max volume competition in the street each day. Neighbours here don't complain about noise, not even during the night, it's just accepted as a way of life.
The kids have a play area in the middle of the neighbourhood, bear in mind here we are only talking about five streets. There is a play area at one end for the younger kids, la cancha (pitch) in the middle for the daily games of football and a small chapel (la capilla) at the far end. Mass is at nine o'clock on Sundays!

You can buy a house here for about £18,000 fully fitted. The picture here is of a house on a corner plot on our street. If you are prepared to do all of the work yourself then you can buy a 'casa negra' in this condition for £9,000 but you are basically just getting the concrete walls and plot. There is no first fix of plumbing or electrics yet.

Technical point

For learners of Spanish. When using direct object pronouns (los objetos de complemento directo) in Colombia don't use 'lo' to refer to 'él', like in Spain. Use 'le'.

A little bit of England

I am sitting in the sun with mangos growing in the garden, palm trees lining the streets, an absolutely wonderful wife indoors and a great cup of coffee but I feel that there is just one little thing missing.............a little bit of England

Does anyone read this stuff?

I do post new stuff from time to time but does anyone actually read this stuff. I'm only wondering if there is any point in continuing? Please feel free to leave comments so that I know it is worthwhile writing theses things!

The best advice!

Nickelback: "If today was your last day!" You need to click on this link to view it!

Start of a new day

I'm just waiting for mamá Mariela to make me breakfast, it's not really an option for men to make themselves anything. Also I'm waiting for Cecy to wake up but for the first time in a while though I'm not sat here with a stomach full of anxiety. I want to enjoy my life with my wife by my side and I'm not going to help that by looking backwards. I'm eating better, my appetite has returned. I'm sleeping better and feeling happier. When I say I'm sleeping better I mean that I do sleep longer now but there are slight obstacles. Juan Felipe suffers nightmares and has been accustomed to sleeping with his mum. I fell asleep early last night, Cecy was watching the telenovelas in another room. I awoke two or three times when she crept into the room for things so I wasn't sleeping deeply. I awoke again at 2 o'clock when Juan Fe came in to call his mum, she sleeps with him in his bed whenever he wants. I woke twice more when colleagues of police officers in our street arrived to pick them up, at 4 o'clock and at half past four. They park in front of the houses and just start hitting their car horns like Keith Moon on speed! Cecy and the kids got up at this point to get them ready for school, they leave at five-thirty. I woke up at six-thirty welcomed by a kiss and a smile. Doesn't sound like much, getting a kiss, but I got up feeling on top of the world. This could be a very good day. Optimism at last!

Relapse

Oops! I thought everything was over with but in typical female fashion she was just saving a little last twist of the knife. It's a tactics the ladies are good at just to keep you in your subservient place. A little bit of history then just to explain. I found out about something the wife had done and when I sifted through my options for possible responses, beating about the bush wasn't on the table. Instead then I opted for the full on assault choosing my favourite weapon for the battlefield in front of me: the lazer tipped, self guided tongue lashing. The confrontation was short lived but I left the room happy with myself that I had inflicted sufficient response to rule out the possibility of retaliation. I even felt I detected a slight blue haze and the smell of cordite in the air. I did however manage to resist the temptation to throw her a steely gaze and say, "I'll be back" in an Americanised German accent.
The trouble is that I had miscalculated. I hadn't reckoned on her use of psychological countermeasures and today I suffered a stealth retaliatory strike. We were watching a DVD together  thinking we had pretty much restored diplomatic relations when she hit me with the, "You said some cruel things and you hurt me, and I haven't done anything wrong!" Shit! It was the barefaced denial response. There's not a lot you can do to justify you own actions when the opposition hasn't done anything wrong. I had more justification than the Americans in Iraq however as I had actually found her WMDs, that was the point of the argument. The problem was the proof in this case was painted in a colour that is invisible to her eyes so it isn't any use in the court of Shay and Cecy.
Never mind. I'm sure that everything will be right as rain again soon. I've switched to a new tactic these days. Now that I've recognised that it is impossible to win an argument through logic I've switched to the "run away"  battle plan. It's more difficult to argue with me when I'm not in the house.
Personally I'm feeling much better. I still feel incredible sad at times during the day when I remember what she has done but in the face of having an impossible to win argument I think it is better just to try to forget everything. She is my wife. We are going to stay together (I really did consider coming back to England), and the truth is I love her very, very much. I know under her hurt at the moment, she loves me just as much. I think to try to win the argument at the moment would be like choosing not to open my parachute because I'm enjoying the free-fall so much. I'd much rather pull the rip cord and meet my beautiful wife safely to spend the rest of our lives together.

Arguments

The upside of having an argument is the post blitz relief........thank £#<$ that's over. I have a real problem in that I'm a very early riser which means that I get up in the morning and have a few hours to sit and worry about that day's reaction. The truth is that I've had a torrid few days but trying to keep a positive attitude at least I have managed to reduce my body fat by a few degrees. I never thought I'd get rid of that last little bulge at the bottom of the abdomen. For those who are wondering how to do it then take a tip from me, just pass a few days worried sick, in perpetual torment, hardly sleeping or eating and hey presto! You'll be there.

Hopefully after overcoming a potentially critical argument in a relationship you can come out of the other side so much stronger for the experience. They say that you find your good friends in a storm and I've managed to do so I think. Luckily, I married one of them a few weeks ago. I find that marriage is so much more rewarding when you absolutely adore your wife. Hopefully I'll be able to get to Bogotá for my visa next week all things going well. Once again this is down to good friends in a storm.

I also have to praise my family here in Colombia. They have been incredibly supportive, in a manner which I don't think you would find in the UK. I have had my moments here though when I would have liked support UK style. I hardly ever drink here but there have been moments when I could have sold my soul for a proper pint. At the moment what started as another day of trial and tribulation looks like finishing brilliantly. We made up this afternoon and the relief for me was incredible, oddly I suddenly felt really tired. I popped to bed to relax for a few moments but fell asleep for four hours. I haven't been doing that at night!